Politics

Palm Beach, FL – Former president Donald Trump was arrested on Saturday night after he verbally abused a McDonald’s drive-through worker who refused to acknowledge that he was still the president and that his lawyer Rudy Giuliani was his secret son with porn star Stormy Daniels.

According to witnesses, Trump, who was visibly intoxicated, drove his golf cart to the McDonald’s outlet and ordered a Big Mac, fries, and a Diet Coke. He then demanded that the employee, a 19-year-old college student named Mike Jones, call him “Mr. President” and salute him.

When Jones refused, Trump became enraged and started yelling at him, calling him a “loser”, a “traitor”, and a “fake news”. He also claimed that he had won the 2020 election by a landslide and that the Democrats had stolen it from him with the help of China, Iran, and Venezuela.

He then proceeded to reveal his “biggest secret”, which was that his former lawyer and ally Rudy Giuliani was actually his illegitimate son with Stormy Daniels, the porn star who allegedly had an affair with him in 2006. He said that he had paid Daniels $130,000 to keep quiet about the affair and the child, and that he had hired Giuliani to represent him in various lawsuits and investigations because he was loyal and obedient.

He also said that Giuliani had undergone plastic surgery and hair dye to look more like him, and that he had taught him how to lie and cheat. He said that he was proud of his son and that he was grooming him to be his successor.

Trump’s rant was captured on video by another customer, who posted it on social media, where it quickly went viral. The police arrived shortly after and arrested Trump for disorderly conduct, public intoxication, and driving under the influence. He was taken to the local jail, where he continued to rant and rave.

Trump’s spokesperson, who declined to be named, said that Trump was suffering from “stress and fatigue” and that he had “misspoken” in his statements. He said that Trump had apologized to Jones and that he had offered to pay for his college tuition. He also said that Trump had no relation to Giuliani or Daniels, and that he had fired Giuliani for being incompetent and disloyal.

Giuliani, who was reached for comment, said that he was “shocked and hurt” by Trump’s allegations. He said that he had no idea that Trump was his father, and that he had never met Daniels in his life. He said that he had always respected and admired Trump, and that he had done everything in his power to help him. He said that he was considering suing Trump for defamation and emotional distress.

Daniels, who was also contacted, said that she was “amused and flattered” by Trump’s claims. She said that she had indeed had an affair with Trump, but that she had never gotten pregnant by him. She said that she had no clue who Giuliani was, and that he looked nothing like Trump or her. She said that she was willing to take a DNA test to prove her point, and that she was also thinking of suing Trump for slander and harassment.